Archive for lgbt

sense of self

Posted in Life in general with tags , , on Tuesday 20 July 2010 by amanda

There is this fantastic new post up at Below the Belt, called Boy or girl? I think neither. It reminds me a little of a few other queer individuals that I know who have struggled, and are still struggling, with society’s binary view of sex and gender.  I don’t have a lot of commentary on the piece, I just wanted to promote it because I think it’s awesome to see that there are spaces, communities and individuals who 1) are ABLE to defy binary spaces, and 2) support people who are queer and not cis-gendered, despite all of the hurdles and injuries that stand in the way.

Iowa allows same-sex marriage!!!

Posted in Life in general with tags , , , on Friday 3 April 2009 by amanda

Yaaay!  Of course it’s being challenged, but hurrah for the Iowa Supreme Court – I’m not done reading the opinion, but so far, I LIKE.

Here is the opinion.

Here is the Des Moines Register Article.

Here is an awesome list of why gay marriage is totally wrong (not written by me).

1) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.

2) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.

3) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven’t adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans.

4) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn’t changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can’t marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.

5) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Britney Spears’ 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.

6) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn’t be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren’t full yet, and the world needs more children.

7) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.

8) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That’s why we have only one religion in America.

9) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That’s why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.

10) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a ferret has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

so what do I think about marriage?

Posted in Life in general with tags , , on Wednesday 12 November 2008 by amanda

well, i don’t think that marriage needs to be done away with all together.  i do think that there should be a separation between marriage and civil unions.  

marriage should be:  something governed by religion.  you get married in a mosque, temple, cathedral, synagogue, church, etc.  you are married by a religious authority.  your vows are religiously based, or spiritually based.  your vows bind you morally and within your religion.  religious groups should have full authority to marry or not marry whomever they want to include or exclude.

marriage should not be:  a legal entity recognized by the state (for anybody, gay or straight)

civil unions should be:  the only way that the state legally recognized a union between two people who want to share their lives and give each other particular legal privileges.  you have a civil union performed/signed in a courthouse, by a judge or justice.  there are no religious connotations.  it’s a civil contract, conferring rights, responsibilities and intention.  civil unions must be open to all consenting adults (sorry, i really can’t give personal endorsement to really young civil unions).

so…say you’re catholic.  (i’m not, but in this example, you are).  you want to get married to somebody that is not your same sex and gender.  you go to the priest and get that part done and have a huge party.  then you head down to the courthouse and sign some papers.  so both the church and the state recognize you and your partner.

soo…say you’re still catholic (or whatever).  you want to marry somebody that is identified as your same sex and gender.  the catholic church tells you that is not okay.  you’re sad (or not) and just go to the court house and sign some papers.  Later, you get a friend to lead a commitment ceremony for your friends and family and have a huge party.  

okay, i’ve probably made my point.  i know this doesn’t address poly relationships, and it does not address the rights of people that just plain don’t want to have to get married or have a civil union but still want their relationship recognized.  and it doesn’t address the issue of just throwing out state-recognized unions altogether.  maybe later…

arkansas ban on unmarried foster care and adoption

Posted in Life in general with tags , , on Wednesday 12 November 2008 by amanda

so…arkansas won’t let gay couples be married.  now they are forbidding anybody in a non-state-recognized marriage who is cohabiting from adopting or providing foster care.  of course, this will inhibit straight couples, but the reason that this was put together is to stop gay couples from adopting or providing foster care.

this is just such a bad idea for two reasons:

1.  yet another rights violation against the LGBT community (and also any other couple unmarried for any reason that wants to expand their family through adoption or foster care)

2.  cutting out even more families from adopting and providing foster care for kids that desperately need it.  

Here’s a NYT article that brought my attention to the issue, which I really didn’t realize was going on at all, sadly.

Anti-Gay, Anti-Family
Published: November 12, 2008
The potential implications of a proposed Arkansas law that bans people who are “cohabitating outside a valid marriage” from serving as foster parents or adopting children are terrifying.

Olberman on Prop 8

Posted in Life in general with tags , , , on Tuesday 11 November 2008 by amanda


i am still bitterly disappointed in california that they voted to ban gay marriage there. it makes me sad. it makes me angry. it makes my head and my heart hurt. what’s wrong with recognizing that two people love each other? keith olberman does a not-too-bad job.