Archive for marriage

so what do I think about marriage?

Posted in Life in general with tags , , on Wednesday 12 November 2008 by amanda

well, i don’t think that marriage needs to be done away with all together.  i do think that there should be a separation between marriage and civil unions.  

marriage should be:  something governed by religion.  you get married in a mosque, temple, cathedral, synagogue, church, etc.  you are married by a religious authority.  your vows are religiously based, or spiritually based.  your vows bind you morally and within your religion.  religious groups should have full authority to marry or not marry whomever they want to include or exclude.

marriage should not be:  a legal entity recognized by the state (for anybody, gay or straight)

civil unions should be:  the only way that the state legally recognized a union between two people who want to share their lives and give each other particular legal privileges.  you have a civil union performed/signed in a courthouse, by a judge or justice.  there are no religious connotations.  it’s a civil contract, conferring rights, responsibilities and intention.  civil unions must be open to all consenting adults (sorry, i really can’t give personal endorsement to really young civil unions).

so…say you’re catholic.  (i’m not, but in this example, you are).  you want to get married to somebody that is not your same sex and gender.  you go to the priest and get that part done and have a huge party.  then you head down to the courthouse and sign some papers.  so both the church and the state recognize you and your partner.

soo…say you’re still catholic (or whatever).  you want to marry somebody that is identified as your same sex and gender.  the catholic church tells you that is not okay.  you’re sad (or not) and just go to the court house and sign some papers.  Later, you get a friend to lead a commitment ceremony for your friends and family and have a huge party.  

okay, i’ve probably made my point.  i know this doesn’t address poly relationships, and it does not address the rights of people that just plain don’t want to have to get married or have a civil union but still want their relationship recognized.  and it doesn’t address the issue of just throwing out state-recognized unions altogether.  maybe later…